No. 2
YOUR routine
I AM FINDING MYSELF…
It’s a process and a journey that I know doesn’t end at the end of my day. The truth is, it will never end. Not even when I’ve had kids and have had a career for twenty years. Everyday, and if not everyday, many days a week, I will discover something new. Isn’t that so cool? This week, can you take note of what you learn about yourself? If you choose to do so, I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised by how much you open up.
That was off topic. Or was it? Everything is connected somehow. Our brains work so hard and so fast that sometimes, we forget what we really wanted to talk about. Something else comes to our minds and connects us to another topic. But aha! I remember now…
I’m really excited about the topic of this post. It’s something that has completely changed the bond I have with myself, which drastically improves my bond with the world. I have hopes and dreams that it can do the same for everyone else, once you make it yours. I’m passionate about this!
Today I’m writing about Routine. Something that is severely underrated and yet crucial for overall wellness. At least that’s my belief. A healthy Routine can create a desire to take care of yourself and even deepen that desire if you let it. I’ll even be sharing some of my routines with you so that you get the full picture!
“Scent of Morning”- By A.L.N
"Timing"- By Tarah SchomerTo begin, let us define Routine. The Wonderful Web (AKA, the Merriam-Webster Dictionary) has two definitions for the word but I want to focus on some buzzwords surrounding the definition - as they are important to the meaning as a whole. If you search for Routine in the Wonderful Web, you’ll see the words “regular”, “habitual”, “mechanical”, and “ordinary”. Now I want you to get excited…
Close your eyes and picture what a world filled with self-stimulatory behavior (and practices) that become habitual/mechanical and regular/ordinary would look like for you. Doesn’t that feel good? The exciting news is that you don’t have to stop after you picture what it would “look like”.
You heard me right. Open your eyes and stop imagining it. It’s time to do more. You feel it, so welcome in that feeling. It’s time to be it. It’s time to make self-care not only regular and ordinary but habitual and mechanical.
I began to understand the importance of Routine only recently. There is a Routine that our culture has placed emphasis and value on in the recent years. That routine is one involving our faces. A skincare Routine - a list of carefully placed steps and an assortment of carefully chosen products for your face. I can’t imagine my life without this specific Routine. I can barely imagine going a day without it. What is a day without doing my morning or nightly skincare Routine? Risky is what it is.
Any Routine should be thought of as a tradition or a ritual. Even a skincare Routine. A Routine is like a sort of gift. You’re giving yourself a gift. The gift of familiarity, safety, and attention.
What are some rituals or traditions that you hold close to you? Do you have any at all? If not, I encourage you to start creating them! Once a month, try treating yourself to take-out at your favorite restaurant. Try audibly, mentally, or physically listing three things that you’re thankful for once a day or even at the end of your week.
My days are always different. Not just because of my changing schedule or my evolving plans. But because who I am is always different. Sometimes I’m sad. Sometimes I’m happy. Sometimes I can’t control what I feel. But I crave consistency and to my dismay, I live in an inconsistent world where it’s hot in the mornings and cool in the evenings. I wake up tired, find energy in the afternoon and am exhausted by dinner. I find it all challenging and beautiful. It is wonderful to be put in a position of discomfort. It cultivates strength. So when my days are always different and my emotions are flying around and difficult to express, my Routines keep me sane. I’ll share some with you now!
FIRST ROUTINE OF THE DAY - 8 AM:
After I’ve laid in bed for no longer than 30 minutes, letting my mind wander, praying for my soul, the day ahead of me, and for my loved ones, I head to the bathroom to pee-pee and wash my face. On my way there, I stop in my kitchen and I light a candle (I love the scent of coffee in the morning even though I’m not a big coffee drinker). This is followed by me retreating back to my room to execute my morning skincare routine. Then, I make up my bed. I cannot function if my bed isn’t made. When I’m stressed and life feels a bit chaotic, it is projected onto my spaces. Especially my room. To avoid this in whatever way I can, I ALWAYS make sure my bed is made!
I end up back in the kitchen but this time to eat something. Before I get started, I connect my phone to the speaker in the living room and put on the playlist that fits my mood. It’s typically always always always soft acoustic. Now I bring out the cutting board to slice a mango and a banana. Indulging in a bowl of fruit - first and before anything else in the morning - has done wonders for my digestion
Then I eat the bowl or fruit! As I do, I’ll journal, peruse through Pinterest, text my mother (Hi mommy!), and go over my agenda for the day
Lastly, I brush my teeth, pick out my outfit and do my hair. All in preparation for the day!
Now that Summer is over, my Routine is changing. I no longer can move so freely. No more mid-week window shopping, going on sporadic walks, or treating myself to a desert at a local cafe in the afternoons. I’m still trying to get my new Routine under control. One that incorporates my class schedule this semester. But another Routine I have, is my cooking Routine. It’s simple and relaxing.
SECOND ROUTINE OF THE DAY - 7 OR 8 PM:
Light a candle. Not coffee this time. Because that’s gross
Put on my Jazz playlist. Sometimes I’ll play my decades playlist. But jazz is my favorite to cook and dine to (Micheal Bublé has the voice of an angel) P.s - find my dinner playlist here!
Eat
Clean the kitchen when I’ve finished eating! Trust me, you’ll feel better if you do it after dinner. Don’t wait until the next day
To keep things short, all I will say is my bedtime Routine changes often and I don’t always go to bed at the same time every night.
THIRD ROUTINE OF THE DAY - BEFORE 12 AM:
Cocoa butter after a hot shower
Ice-cold water after brushing my teeth
Nighttime skincare Routine
This NEVER changes!
I also have other Routines such as paying bills on the same day every month. But those are not fun. And frankly, I prefer to not write about them. I’m sure you understand.
But I do want to add something else…
I formed a new Routine the other day and this is the first time I’m even talking about it. Which means I now have to commit to it. I was working on a homework assignment and it seemed that with each passing minute, I sunk deeper and deeper into said assignment. I didn’t even notice how tense my body was and how narrow my vision was becoming. I don’t know what compelled me to do so, but I walked away from my screen for just a moment. Maybe I saw something on the floor I wanted to pick up. I’m so glad I walked away, because when I did, I took a large gasp for air. After that, I couldn’t move because a lot of thoughts hit me at once. “How much time had I spent drowning in my computer screen?” and “Why did I just take the biggest breath of my life?” I began thinking about how our minds are so powerful. They are a dedicated and committed system and I am thankful for that. But is it healthy to become completely submerged in a task, so much that you have to gasp for air? Don’t answer that because it’s a rhetorical question. It’s also a complicated question. I often find myself falling down rabbit holes — some good and some bad. Sometimes I climb back up the rabbit hole feeling more educated on a subject. And other times I feel anxious and desperate for more answers.
So after I took some time to stand still in my kitchen, I decided I was going to take care of myself and forgive myself for whatever I just put my body through. I made a cup of tea, put on some sweatpants, and went outside to sit on my balcony where the weather was perfect and the setting-sun sky was in view. All I knew is I had to separate myself from the previous environment. I knew I wasn’t done with my homework, but at the same time, I knew that it wouldn’t have been a quality assignment if I didn’t take a break to re-focus. Taking a break is a new Routine I will implement into my daily life. It’s important to be gentle with yourself and you can do that by simply taking a break.
TAKE A BREAK ROUTINE - 24/7:
Step away
Take an informed breath
Ask “how do I feel?” or “what do I need?”
Act accordingly
So as you begin to create some Routines, it’s all about what works for you. Always start small, but don’t think small. Think big. You have the power to restructure your world with the act of reframing your mind. When you find the little things that improve the quality of your day, you will know they are Yours. So practice them and make your Routine Yours. I hope you thrive. Actually, I know you will.
Yours and yours truly,
Ashley
