RELAX WHILE RE-FOCUSING AND RE-ALIGNING
January 29th, 9am EST
Article by Ashley
Dealing with new beginnings can be hard.
Any transitional phase in life can be, but with days that are colder, darker and shorter, our emotions can be extremely turbulent. If you’re about to start something new or if you’ve already done so, then this article is for you.
With the holidays ending and for some, a new semester of school beginning, it’s okay to feel un-balanced and lost. As we continue to navigate those feelings, it’s important to show ourselves compassion and respect. Here are 8 simple steps to achieving a state of relaxation and balance while re-focusing and re-aligning as you adjust to the new.
1
Give yourself grace
Realize and accept that everything takes time. You are constantly learning and growing.
Don’t beat yourself up when things don’t go as planned. When you run out of time or when you get something wrong, allow yourself to fail and try again the next day or even the next week. Affirm yourself: “I am figuring it out”
As you become familiar with something new, some moments will feel good and some won’t. But that’s okay! You will fall into a rhythm that’s ideal for you and it will become natural.
2
Map out a routine and create rituals
Now it’s time to take action. Ease into a routine with care and attentiveness.
With each day that passes, imagine the perfect schedule. Stay present and try not to think about the days to come. Next week, when that day comes around again, try and follow your schedule to the T. Continue to discover what works and what doesn’t. For example: maybe working on homework for two hours in between classes didn’t work for you. Maybe you’ll try taking an hour break and working on homework for only 30 minutes.
Reflect on what felt good and what didn’t feel so good yesterday or last week. Be sure to continuously keep track of those thoughts and feelings, for they can turn into a self-help book. One that is created by you and for you. What made your days better and how can they be further improved? These small wins can become rituals that ensure you’re taking care of yourself in the midst of change and what may feel like chaos.
3
Find your staples
Things will fall apart. And when they do, you should have something that keeps you pushing forward.
Dedicate yourself to two goals — goals that are helpful to you, your health, and overall well-being. This way, you will always feel like you’re working for something other than what’s required of you in school or at your job. For example: increasing water intake and getting consistent sleep. Maybe you want to get a 15 minute walk in everyday and finish your homework by 8pm.
Figure out what elements or objects anchor you and cling to them! When you find yourself overwhelmed and worn-out, just about ready to give up, the thing that makes you smile could be your saving grace. For example: anticipating the spring season, listening to a playlist that helps you study or simply makes you dance.
4
Listen to your body and set boundaries
It’s so easy to go into overdrive and work until you reach a breaking point… but don’t!
As an act of honor and love towards yourself and your life, take breaks when your body asks for them. Your eyes are straining and hands are hurting but still, you continue to stare at the screen and write in your notebook. Why? Your stomach is growling but you refuse to eat. Why? Stand up and stretch. Get some fresh air. And seriously, eat when you’re hungry!
We all have sensitivities — buttons we don’t like being pushed. The people in our lives, if they are any kind of real friend, are aware of those buttons and respect them. We should show ourselves the same level of respect. You know yourself better than anyone else and so you know how much energy you have and how much attention you can give to a certain task. You can feel when your productivity is dying. Set time limits and stop overworking.
5
Forge a support system
You don’t have to go through this alone.
Identify the most reliable person/people in your life and ask them to hold you accountable. Make a group-chat or schedule check-ins. Make them aware of your assignments and tasks and plan together. It’s also important to affirm each other as well.
In doing this, you will receive a lot of love which will make you feel secure. Don’t forget to extend that feeling back out and show up for your friends the same way they show up for you. Think of support as a circle that needs you just as much as you need it too.
6
Plan. Organize. Separate
It will lighten the load.
Start by writing or typing everything out. And I mean everything. To-do lists, assignments, meal plans, daily exercise goals, etc. By doing this, you are freeing yourself — like one big exhale into the universe. Get it out of your head and onto something else that can hold it all. Now, you’ll have something to refer back to over and over. You can keep track of your progress which will also motivate you.
Sifting through different thoughts, emotions, attachments, and tasks isn’t always easy but having the proper tools can allow you to be more successful. Organization is a great skill to have! Organize your work in a way that makes sense to you and keep it separate from other subjects and other areas of life. For example: Don’t use the same notebook as a diary and a school agenda. Pro tip: Try not to do homework in the bed that you sleep in… this is proven to help with anxiety, sleep, and productivity
7
Keep your environments full of comfort
Bring the sunshine inside.
This one is super simple. The more comfortable you are, the safer you’ll feel and you’ll have an easier time relaxing into “the new”. Keep your favorite snacks in a drawer. Burn some candles. Set out plants to keep in your sightline. Have some extra pillows nearby to rest on when you need them!
Everyone’s idea of comfort is going to be different. If you’re living in an environment full of clutter and it stresses you out, clean it up! If you like your clothes on the floor and the sight of an unmade bed makes you feel cozy — if that’s “comforting” to you, keep it that way!
8
Reward yourself
You work so hard and you’re trying so hard. Acknowledge that.
You don’t have to wait for positive feedback on an assignment, a good grade or for something to go right to celebrate. You should be celebrating every moment in between. You should be celebrating your hard-work and dedication.
Watch an episode of the t.v show that you’re binging. Feel free to buy yourself dinner or something else you’ve had your eye on for awhile. You deserve it.
